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i am drowning in
this river
this lake
this ocean
with no surface to break
no light to see
no hand to grasp

i cry for you
and my tears disappear
and overwhelm me once more

please don’t tell anyone
that I’m the kind of girl
who wants to be rescued
the kind of girl
who is afraid
(of so many things)
the kind of girl
who wants to run
the kind of girl
who chokes on words she wants to say
(iwantyouiwantyouiwantyouiwantyouiwantyou)
even when she isn’t
under water
©2008-2009 ~orangecstar
:iconorangecstar:

Author's Comments

new. first thing i've written in about a year. i am not sure about it and feedback would be appreciated. especially in the second stanza...i'm not sure word "drown" fits.

thanks...
C

Comments


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:iconsierraangel:
i like it court!!! i like to word drown too... i dont know about the two ands in the second stanza...

im so glad you are writing poetry again!!!!

it almost reads like a song.....

--
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-»¦«-:blackrose:If I Can't Be A Rock-Star At Least I Can Pretend:blackrose:-»¦«-
:iconorangecstar:
thanks. :)

yeah i've been writing songs as of late. way much fun!

--
For my part I know nothing with any certainty, but the sight of the stars makes me dream...- van Gogh
:icondudewithbraces:
Overwhelm instead of drown? Drown does seem a tad out of place, but very interesting! Looks like you haven't lost your talent! ;)
:iconorangecstar:
overwhelm...i LOVE that! thank hon! you always did have great ideas for my work. :D

and thank you *blush*

--
For my part I know nothing with any certainty, but the sight of the stars makes me dream...- van Gogh

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November 23, 2008
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